THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2010
Everyone wants affirmation and validation. This is a need that wells up from the deepest recesses of our being. No matter what station, age or circumstance, every human being needs to feel accepted and valued. Anyone who wants to enjoy rich and rewarding relationships simply has to understand this basic truth. However this understanding has to be translated into specific behaviour. How do you do that ?
Its really quite simple! Just be an encouraging presence under all circumstances. Never say "I told you so". Instead of looking for faults, focus on strengths. People are usually painfully aware of their own shortcomings so there's no need to rub it in. In any case, are you perfect ? What gives you the right to adopt a holier than thou attitude ? Have you perfected yourself ? Before we criticize, point the finger or lay the blame let's remember that all that will simply create resentment in the other person. This is especially so when the criticism is unsolicited. And let's face it, most of the time your criticism and indeed your input or even advice is suo motu, given without being asked.